Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Nostalgia
'tis my ethos
and my business
model.
but even with knowing you
and all
you
do
its difficult for my
grimy
window to the
world
to clarify
my dancing
nerve ends
tempo,
their song.
So i stare at
a the distorted mirrors
of time
and imagine
nirvana
in the human form
of a
syringe,
but sometimes,
when insulted by my
new chia pet,
i get real,
actual,
glimses of the dank
sunlight
through those
old, old,
clouds.
I smile
at these honest
hallucinations,
for i know they
are real
like Deepthroat was,
like the Jackal
was.
One might think
despair
is next,
but turning pages
is like
losing that favorite
passifier.
Sad,
but inevitable...
'tis my ethos
and my business
model.
but even with knowing you
and all
you
do
its difficult for my
grimy
window to the
world
to clarify
my dancing
nerve ends
tempo,
their song.
So i stare at
a the distorted mirrors
of time
and imagine
nirvana
in the human form
of a
syringe,
but sometimes,
when insulted by my
new chia pet,
i get real,
actual,
glimses of the dank
sunlight
through those
old, old,
clouds.
I smile
at these honest
hallucinations,
for i know they
are real
like Deepthroat was,
like the Jackal
was.
One might think
despair
is next,
but turning pages
is like
losing that favorite
passifier.
Sad,
but inevitable...
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
????
pain ridden eyes,
tear streaked thighs
pulsing for a
goodbye
are the life
of
strife.
But
what?
You expect me
to hide,
to not ride,
to side
with a
unglorious,
uneventful,
non- engagement?
I still dont know what your word-
safe-
meant.
Bent,
am i?
Sureptitiously draped
with morsels-
pics of
crepes- and
drapes
hide
ubiquitous
snakes
who want
my skin,
my breath,
Its their life
through my
death.
But fear not
and kneel high
to chance and the
sky,
for they alone
cry
dry
tears,
and leave
scars,
delicious scars,
that haunt for years
leaving no memory
of original fears,
but DO leave
the residue
of self-
assurance.
tear streaked thighs
pulsing for a
goodbye
are the life
of
strife.
But
what?
You expect me
to hide,
to not ride,
to side
with a
unglorious,
uneventful,
non- engagement?
I still dont know what your word-
safe-
meant.
Bent,
am i?
Sureptitiously draped
with morsels-
pics of
crepes- and
drapes
hide
ubiquitous
snakes
who want
my skin,
my breath,
Its their life
through my
death.
But fear not
and kneel high
to chance and the
sky,
for they alone
cry
dry
tears,
and leave
scars,
delicious scars,
that haunt for years
leaving no memory
of original fears,
but DO leave
the residue
of self-
assurance.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Masochistic, Baby..that why
Esphixiation is so nice
When lying here in mee garden.
The strangling limbs
Of this beautiful, blooming rosebush
Are just as deadly
And ominous
To me
As overdose is
To the
dear
junkie.
A fist that
Grips
For
Life,
That grips for
A slow,
Nice,
Death,
Will
Hold the suns rays
In an incandescent
Hearn,
Which it saves for future dinner parties,
Of course….
I grind and bash and mash
Stained glass into powder
To flavor my lamb,
To sweeten my cake,
And then I relax
And enjoy the blood flavored
Spittle.
I have always been a little self-destructive
I bellow to the unsuspecting sky.
While
Admiring the shape of a mortar shell,
I attended a peace rally
And was thrown out on my
Ass-
The ungrateful bastards!!!!
Don’t they know that without
My appreciation of death,
There are no hippies
Or peace rallies……..
They just don’t know
How
To appreciate
It all at once,
It all for what it is,
it from both sides of the spectrum,
it as a sad, happy, daunting, exuberant…..
experience.
‘cause that’s all it is, really-
An experience I choose to experiment with-
And I choose ignorance of the ignorant,
Abstinence from acquiescence,
Absence from the domicile
Of
Obligatory love,
Faux love,
perpetually abstaining
from
the engagement.
Don’t get mad,
Don’t talk about it,
Play the normalcy game,
Play the ice game,
Own the reality game,
But never buy a club
Membership again.
I wont be pious….
But I will say
Preconceived notions
And established normalcy
Will
Lead to that most
un needed of
emotions-
Guilt.
When lying here in mee garden.
The strangling limbs
Of this beautiful, blooming rosebush
Are just as deadly
And ominous
To me
As overdose is
To the
dear
junkie.
A fist that
Grips
For
Life,
That grips for
A slow,
Nice,
Death,
Will
Hold the suns rays
In an incandescent
Hearn,
Which it saves for future dinner parties,
Of course….
I grind and bash and mash
Stained glass into powder
To flavor my lamb,
To sweeten my cake,
And then I relax
And enjoy the blood flavored
Spittle.
I have always been a little self-destructive
I bellow to the unsuspecting sky.
While
Admiring the shape of a mortar shell,
I attended a peace rally
And was thrown out on my
Ass-
The ungrateful bastards!!!!
Don’t they know that without
My appreciation of death,
There are no hippies
Or peace rallies……..
They just don’t know
How
To appreciate
It all at once,
It all for what it is,
it from both sides of the spectrum,
it as a sad, happy, daunting, exuberant…..
experience.
‘cause that’s all it is, really-
An experience I choose to experiment with-
And I choose ignorance of the ignorant,
Abstinence from acquiescence,
Absence from the domicile
Of
Obligatory love,
Faux love,
perpetually abstaining
from
the engagement.
Don’t get mad,
Don’t talk about it,
Play the normalcy game,
Play the ice game,
Own the reality game,
But never buy a club
Membership again.
I wont be pious….
But I will say
Preconceived notions
And established normalcy
Will
Lead to that most
un needed of
emotions-
Guilt.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Friday, January 11, 2008
everything you pushed
everything you faked with passion
all this is too much
too much to understand
too much to re-experience
too much to love you
again
bloodfilled ditches of the mind
see intuition negligence at fault.
I know so much more than you think i do.
I see
I see it all.
How could i not?
I see this experience as whole
it was finished a long time
ago
and to examine your streamlined actions
is beyond my capabilities for
treachery.
So what?
So where?
So who?
no-one is exempt from benevolent lying.
Why?
Why would you push for your nightmare?
Why would you tease my hands with
visions of mannah from circulonimbi?
What was the point of this?
All the truths that guide:
they blind,
worthless.
I gave you the keys,
even the back door's,
but you didnt really want it.
pretended to
No more illusions
or delusions
only cold-hearted logic
with a splash of Gin
and machoistic
exploitations
everything you faked with passion
all this is too much
too much to understand
too much to re-experience
too much to love you
again
bloodfilled ditches of the mind
see intuition negligence at fault.
I know so much more than you think i do.
I see
I see it all.
How could i not?
I see this experience as whole
it was finished a long time
ago
and to examine your streamlined actions
is beyond my capabilities for
treachery.
So what?
So where?
So who?
no-one is exempt from benevolent lying.
Why?
Why would you push for your nightmare?
Why would you tease my hands with
visions of mannah from circulonimbi?
What was the point of this?
All the truths that guide:
they blind,
worthless.
I gave you the keys,
even the back door's,
but you didnt really want it.
pretended to
No more illusions
or delusions
only cold-hearted logic
with a splash of Gin
and machoistic
exploitations
I feel Sanziband reaching up from the Dead Sea.
It doesnt feel dead right now.
It feels an awful lot like me.
A me i pretend i dont see.
A me i lock out with bolts and dreams and parthenon seams.
I feel death as real now as the day of my birth
The mistress reminds me my old commitments come first.
Clutching a golden fleece with no lining, i know my life is cursed.
Cursed with a gift; I know of my siblings i will take that ice bath swim the worst.
Life just becomes dull when you know whats coming
Standing in dark hallways, i can see the fat lady drumming.
and i spend my solitude like cheap pennies while running.
Running from the bottle, the point, the sniff, but something
has given me peace; i have given up on my cunning
So, back to the bottle it is for I
I will be floatin down a road headed to the sky
waiting for peace and a release to become candy for my eyes.
Time to make things happen again, and i will have to burn others like lye.
It doesnt feel dead right now.
It feels an awful lot like me.
A me i pretend i dont see.
A me i lock out with bolts and dreams and parthenon seams.
I feel death as real now as the day of my birth
The mistress reminds me my old commitments come first.
Clutching a golden fleece with no lining, i know my life is cursed.
Cursed with a gift; I know of my siblings i will take that ice bath swim the worst.
Life just becomes dull when you know whats coming
Standing in dark hallways, i can see the fat lady drumming.
and i spend my solitude like cheap pennies while running.
Running from the bottle, the point, the sniff, but something
has given me peace; i have given up on my cunning
So, back to the bottle it is for I
I will be floatin down a road headed to the sky
waiting for peace and a release to become candy for my eyes.
Time to make things happen again, and i will have to burn others like lye.
heavy handed figures in the shadows
beckon my untame game,
the cocaine in my vein,
the grit in my name,
the acid in my rain,
and the violence in my brain.
They look on disinterested
results are not sine qua none
for their happiness.
No.
They simply want the ride.
Their fingers dipped in the
hourglass without opening
their eyes.
But discussing Job
and why I should be like him
permeates the frozen air
from their forked tongues.
I dont know where this life goes,
where the masters say it shows
what it is for that we overdose
and watch the black blood
flow from a nose.
I know now.
Fleeting passions are the sun,
the moon,
oxygen.
Holding on to truth
will teach you
that there is none,
and has never been.
Fuck what you think is right.
There is no right or wrong.
There is only what you do or dont do.
What you want is what matters.
Motion is deceptive, and
will make you think
it has meaning, but
it doesnt.
Take all
Rape all
Fuck all
You are Lono.
Be the change indeed?
Fuck that.
Abstain
Abstain
Abstain
and love art.
Those are the two
the only
two.
beckon my untame game,
the cocaine in my vein,
the grit in my name,
the acid in my rain,
and the violence in my brain.
They look on disinterested
results are not sine qua none
for their happiness.
No.
They simply want the ride.
Their fingers dipped in the
hourglass without opening
their eyes.
But discussing Job
and why I should be like him
permeates the frozen air
from their forked tongues.
I dont know where this life goes,
where the masters say it shows
what it is for that we overdose
and watch the black blood
flow from a nose.
I know now.
Fleeting passions are the sun,
the moon,
oxygen.
Holding on to truth
will teach you
that there is none,
and has never been.
Fuck what you think is right.
There is no right or wrong.
There is only what you do or dont do.
What you want is what matters.
Motion is deceptive, and
will make you think
it has meaning, but
it doesnt.
Take all
Rape all
Fuck all
You are Lono.
Be the change indeed?
Fuck that.
Abstain
Abstain
Abstain
and love art.
Those are the two
the only
two.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
l;kajsdfl;kjasfd
You want this?
I want this?
all so unclear.....
I knew oceans of blood would be the path,
but i never saw the aerial bombardment coming.
And forests of pleomorphic foliage are
all i see- why? why? why?
Placitory palavering is always this foam,
this worthless fucking foam,
but i sleep in it.
Its in the veins of my neck and the marrow in
my bones.
Loquaciousness is not my way,
but for me to achieve the plenal state,
you must understand this jet plane
is tabescent.
Can't sincerity abound?
I've nothing but an empty soul and
a yearning.
hunger.
for reciprocated benevolence.
That is what matters now.
I love you, but i feel Danu.
fearing The Lost Pleiad.
I want this?
all so unclear.....
I knew oceans of blood would be the path,
but i never saw the aerial bombardment coming.
And forests of pleomorphic foliage are
all i see- why? why? why?
Placitory palavering is always this foam,
this worthless fucking foam,
but i sleep in it.
Its in the veins of my neck and the marrow in
my bones.
Loquaciousness is not my way,
but for me to achieve the plenal state,
you must understand this jet plane
is tabescent.
Can't sincerity abound?
I've nothing but an empty soul and
a yearning.
hunger.
for reciprocated benevolence.
That is what matters now.
I love you, but i feel Danu.
fearing The Lost Pleiad.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)

