everything you pushed
everything you faked with passion
all this is too much
too much to understand
too much to re-experience
too much to love you
again
bloodfilled ditches of the mind
see intuition negligence at fault.
I know so much more than you think i do.
I see
I see it all.
How could i not?
I see this experience as whole
it was finished a long time
ago
and to examine your streamlined actions
is beyond my capabilities for
treachery.
So what?
So where?
So who?
no-one is exempt from benevolent lying.
Why?
Why would you push for your nightmare?
Why would you tease my hands with
visions of mannah from circulonimbi?
What was the point of this?
All the truths that guide:
they blind,
worthless.
I gave you the keys,
even the back door's,
but you didnt really want it.
pretended to
No more illusions
or delusions
only cold-hearted logic
with a splash of Gin
and machoistic
exploitations

I feel Sanziband reaching up from the Dead Sea.

It doesnt feel dead right now.

It feels an awful lot like me.

A me i pretend i dont see.

A me i lock out with bolts and dreams and parthenon seams.



I feel death as real now as the day of my birth

The mistress reminds me my old commitments come first.

Clutching a golden fleece with no lining, i know my life is cursed.

Cursed with a gift; I know of my siblings i will take that ice bath swim the worst.



Life just becomes dull when you know whats coming

Standing in dark hallways, i can see the fat lady drumming.

and i spend my solitude like cheap pennies while running.

Running from the bottle, the point, the sniff, but something

has given me peace; i have given up on my cunning



So, back to the bottle it is for I

I will be floatin down a road headed to the sky

waiting for peace and a release to become candy for my eyes.

Time to make things happen again, and i will have to burn others like lye.

heavy handed figures in the shadows
beckon my untame game,
the cocaine in my vein,
the grit in my name,
the acid in my rain,
and the violence in my brain.

They look on disinterested
results are not sine qua none
for their happiness.
No.
They simply want the ride.
Their fingers dipped in the
hourglass without opening
their eyes.


But discussing Job
and why I should be like him
permeates the frozen air
from their forked tongues.

I dont know where this life goes,
where the masters say it shows
what it is for that we overdose
and watch the black blood
flow from a nose.

I know now.
Fleeting passions are the sun,
the moon,
oxygen.
Holding on to truth
will teach you
that there is none,
and has never been.

Fuck what you think is right.
There is no right or wrong.
There is only what you do or dont do.
What you want is what matters.
Motion is deceptive, and
will make you think
it has meaning, but
it doesnt.
Take all
Rape all
Fuck all
You are Lono.
Be the change indeed?
Fuck that.
Abstain
Abstain
Abstain
and love art.
Those are the two
the only
two.

l;kajsdfl;kjasfd

You want this?

I want this?

all so unclear.....

I knew oceans of blood would be the path,

but i never saw the aerial bombardment coming.

And forests of pleomorphic foliage are

all i see- why? why? why?





Placitory palavering is always this foam,

this worthless fucking foam,

but i sleep in it.

Its in the veins of my neck and the marrow in

my bones.




Loquaciousness is not my way,

but for me to achieve the plenal state,

you must understand this jet plane

is tabescent.






Can't sincerity abound?

I've nothing but an empty soul and

a yearning.

hunger.

for reciprocated benevolence.

That is what matters now.

I love you, but i feel Danu.

fearing The Lost Pleiad.